tell your sister to shave her snatch
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize