Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
