having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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