It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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