Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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