my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
