Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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