Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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