Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
