im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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