She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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