"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
