She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
