If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize