I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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