i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
