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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
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