i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
