Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
