Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
