Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
tell me about the eggs
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
