That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I just threw up on my dentist
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I will pee on everything he values.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
