your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
