I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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