My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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