Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
