I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
As shirtless as possible
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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