If i come over, it means nothing
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Randomize
