Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
you never un-have a 4some
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
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