can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
