He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
