So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
