Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
