Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
