Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize