would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
you inspire me to be a worse person
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
