I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Randomize
