I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
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