I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
