I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize