I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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