When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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