i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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