I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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