You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
