You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
