Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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