Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
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