so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
