Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
