So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize